If I Were A Boy (I Think I Could Understand)
by Ink Runs Through My Veins
Summary: A little one-shot involving Mulan, some dumb country bumpkins, and a golden proverb.


So I think I started this 2 or so years ago and I've been slowly, and painfully, writing. But it's finally finished! So please enjoy.

I don't own the characters. I attach strings to them and shout, "Dance marionettes! Dance for my pleasure!"

* * *

The blossom trees were blooming beautifully along the path to the market. The falling petals against the blue of the sky and the brown of the tree trunks made for a picture perfect afternoon.

Fa Mulan smiled and bent down to sniff at a yellow flower. She quite enjoyed her time outside, especially the days after the nightfall rain. The air was sweet with the perfume of flowers and tiny puddles covered the ground. She fondly remembered staring into the puddles for hours on end when she was a child.

Suddenly her own brown eyes turned into the pale ones of Shan Yu.

Mulan shivered and it wasn't from the slight wind. Every time she thought that name she thought of those eyes: the yellow, almost sickly, obsessed eyes had turned on her with murderous intentions. Even though she knew he was gone, those eyes would haunt her for the rest of her life.

Mulan tightened her fist around her basket and hurried forward. That was the past. She was the hero of China and it was time to act like it. She tried to calm her mind and enjoy the sunny day. She was out in the bazaar, buying silk for her mother to make a new shenyi for her. While Mulan did appreciate it, she felt these things a waste of money considering she liked her work dress (and the clothes she wore when she disguised herself as a man) far better than she did any dress made of silk. But if it made her mother happy then she would play the grateful daughter and bite her tongue.

Mulan finally came upon the silk merchant stall. "Hello Cheng. It's been awhile."

The older man looked up and beamed. "Well, if it isn't the hero of China! Welcome back Mulan. On some errands for your Ma?"

"Mama wants to make me a new dress."

She must have cringed or something because the older man started to laugh. "Not really what you want, huh? You would rather have a man's shirt and pants with a sword at your side."

Mulan sheepishly smiled. "Is it that obvious?"

Cheng Li smiled and disappeared into his stall, only to come back later with a roll of what looked like spun gold. "I have just the thing for you." Carefully, Cheng Li rolled out the fabric. Instead of being a typical pale pink or an elegant blue (as was the typical fabric that most women purchased at the market) the fabric was a deep gold, so shiny that Mulan could see her face in the reflection of the fabric. Cheng Li smiled proudly. "It's my best silk. This was spun by special silk worms from the capital."

Mulan's eyes widened. "Then I'm afraid I can't afford this."

Cheng Li waved away her protests. "On me, for saving all of China."

Mulan blushed and softly groaned. This was the typical response her village gave her whenever she shopped. Her grandma encouraged her to take advantage of her status ("Especially that grumpy Yu Na. She always rips me off on my purchases!") but she felt uncomfortable in doing so. She had not saved China to have bragging rights or free things from the market. "Please, at least let me pay you half."

"You would still not be able to afford even half this fabric." Cheng Li pointed out gently.

Mulan bit her lip and tried to think of a solution before she saw it. The emerald fabric that hung on display was definitely the fabric she wanted for her dress. And then she knew what she would do. "How about a compromise?"

"Hm?"

She pointed to the gold fabric. "I'll take a yard of the gold fabric for free, if I can get three yards of that," She pointed to her preferred fabric. "for full price. This will be fair."

Cheng Li stared at her for a few moments before tipping his head back and roaring with laughter. In fact, Mulan almost chuckled, he even scared away the birds in the nearby forests. "You've become quite the woman, Fa Mulan. Deal."

Mulan smiled before she heard the sneering. She turned around and almost groaned. Gui, Long, and Wong were the neighborhood bullies when they were all growing up. Even now they still hadn't really changed. Being the sons of esteemed merchants, they were quite used to getting everything they thought they deserved. Food, toys, women; if they wanted it, they got it. They made fun of Mulan for being the daughter of a farmer and her uniqueness.

When she came back from saving China they still pushed her buttons, even going so far as to wonder out loud if she was even a girl in front of the whole town. Once she proved that even a girl could kick them all to the curb they left sourly licking their wounds. But it seemed that they loved harassing her still.

"What'cha buying this time Mulan?" Sneered Long. "Something to try and make you look even remotely like a girl?"

Gui snickered. "That's impossible. Everyone knows Mulan is a boy in secret."

"Thank the ancestors Mu Shu isn't here." Mulan wryly thought as they continued to throw insults at her. "He would set all of them on fire. As it is, he's probably glaring at the boys and muttering to himself."

"...And her commanding officer must have been as dumb as a sack of stones for not even realizing she's obviously a girl!" That last comment from Wong set off a round of laughter from the three boys. The square froze with horror.

Mulan's eyes narrowed. It was one thing to hurl insults at her. She could even take them berating her family because they were only boys. But insulting General Li Shang? Were these boys asking for a licking?

Cheng Li growled with distaste. "You boys better take that back!" He bellowed, capturing the attention of the nearby people. "Li Shang is twice the man any of you will ever be! How dare you disrespect him!"

Wong sneered. "Puh-lease! If he didn't realize Fa Mulan was a girl, then he doesn't deserve to be respected!" He puffed out his chest, only emphasizing his lack of muscles. "I would have been a much better commanding officer."

"Indeed." Mulan stated dryly. "If only you had not been kicked in the head by an ass the day you were born."

The market exploded with laughter. Well known and not well-liked, the three boys were known for making a ruckus in the market. There was always a crowd whenever Mulan and the three boys were within a few yards of each other as the possibility of a public and verbal-spanking almost always occurred.

The three boys flushed. "How dare you!" Gui squealed. "You lowly farmer whore!"

The square went silent again. Mulan was silent. But while the square had a shocked silence, Mulan's was fury. "You must not value your life very much if you dare to insult the woman who saved China and was awarded the pendant of the Emperor." She put an emphasis on the last four words, watching with sadistic glee as they paled.

Long was the first to snap out of their cowering. "It doesn't matter. You're a woman, and you'll always be below us!" He quickly grabbed the gold fabric from Mulan's basket and threw it to the ground. He stomped on it, laughing gleefully as he did so. His friends joined him, watching in delight as Cheng Li grew paler and paler.

"My silk!" He howled, as if bit by a dog. He ran forward to stop the boys, only to be roughly pushed back into Mulan. She grunted as they both fell to the ground.

Gui saw the opportunity. He grabbed a sword from a nearby stall and unsheathed it, taking a minute to admire the craftsmanship of the weapon before point in it at the two fallen people. He sneered and Mulan saw a dangerous glint in his eyes. "I think I shall punish you for your insolence." He sneered even further when Cheng Li shivered with fright. Even Gui's friends were shocked. "How about a slice through her leg for every day you were disguised as a man?"

Cheng Li, bless his heart, stood shakily. "E-Even you can not pass that judgement."

"Silence!" Gui screamed and swung his sword at the quivering older man.

Mulan didn't even think as she ran to Cheng-Li and used her body to shield her friend. Her body tensed as it waited for the pain. Instead she heard the clang of another sword against Gui's. She looked up, definitely not expecting to see Shang on his horse, his sword protecting her.

Shang looked down on Gui, glaring at the boy in distaste. "Why are you attacking the hero of China?"

Mulan desperately hid her blush. It always embarrassed her whenever others would name her like that. With Li Shang it was downright mortifying.

Gui wearily drew back. "I-I was just punishing her."

Shang's eyes narrowed. "For what?"

Gui swallowed. "S-She ran off with her father's armor." He grew more confident with every word. "She should have been executed when it was discovered! She is a disgrace to all women!"

"No." Shang jumped off his horse and turned his head towards Mulan with a kind smile. "She is the embodiment of what everyone should be; brave, courageous, and kind. A wonderful person."

Mulan smiled softly and tried to ignore how her insides turned to rice pudding at his words.

Long scoffed. "Like any woman could be superior to a man. Especially that one."

Mulan's eyes narrowed dangerously. She smirked when she took a step forward and all three boys unconsciously took a step back. "Do you really want a repeat of last month?"

The whole square laughed when the three boys went green. That had been a very public reckoning and all of them were very eager to not have to face the same humiliation twice.

Gui pouted and dropped the sword, ignoring the weapon vendor's dismayed cries. "Fine." He glared at Mulan. "We won't forget this."

"I sincerely hope not." Mulan put her hands on her hips and smiled sweetly. "It would be a shame to forget the first time you were reprimanded by General Li Shang." With one last snarl in her direction, the three boys ran away. Mulan blew a raspberry at them. "And stay gone."

Shang laughed. "It appears I was here just in time."

She turned to him. "Not that I'm not happy to see you, but what are you doing here? Are there any new orders from the Emperor?"

Shang shook his head as he grinned sheepishly. "Maybe I felt like stopping by?"

Mulan gave him a knowing look. "My village is a three day journey from the palace. Unless you are headed to a mission without me, which I would be beyond angry at you, you weren't just passing by."

Shang blushed as the people in the square whistled and laughed at him. Cheng Li shooed the crowd. "That's enough. The show is over, folks. Get back to your errands." He sighed as he picked up the ruined silk. "And I just received it last week too." He turned to Mulan. "I'll cut you another yard, as thanks for defending me from those ruffians."

"I can't accept that."

"How much is this yard of fabric?" They both turned to Shang in shock. Stuttering, Cheng Li named his price. Shang nodded. "Send the bill to my residence. I'll pay for it as thanks for standing up for Mulan."

Mulan shook her head but let her general do as he pleased. Once her silk was wrapped in her basket she set off for home, General Shang and his steed at her side.

"So why are you here, Shang?"

He gave her an embarrassed look. "There was a training accident. I may have injured myself-not terribly." The female warrior felt herself relax. "Just enough that the Emperor ordered me to recover somewhere away from the palace for awhile."

Mulan raised a suspicious brow. "And you came to my village?"

"My family owns a villa two more days outside of your town. I would have passed through anyways. I figured I would stop by and pay my respects to you and your family while I was in the area."

Mulan laughed. "Thank you. Grandma will be delighted you stopped by."

* * *

And she was. The Fa matriarch was overjoyed that her favorite general was in her home. "Come in! Come in, General Shang!" Shang gave Mulan an amused look as her grandmother dragged the man further into her home. "You're looking much too skinny. We'll have some of my famous duck and some dumpling soup." She winked. "The sauce is a special Fa recipe."

Mulan leaned over when her grandmother was gone. "Orange zest, lemon, and ginger are the so called secret ingredients. Baba just wants people to think she has a special recipe."

They both laughed. Shang was right to have come here. The Fa family was open and generous and especially warm. His mother did love him, but she is a stiff court woman who has trained her whole life to not show open emotion. Trying to get a loving word from her was a similar experience to pulling teeth.

Later, his belly full and hunger sated, Shang watched from the garden bridge as Mulan's grandmother chased a particularly mischievous chicken. Mulan laughed next to him. "Watching that never gets old."

"I agree."

They sat in silence (the chicken finally scurried away into it's pen) when the general suddenly spoke. "I meant what I said, back in the square."

"I know. And I appreciate it." She huffed. "I just wish those idiots would get a clue and leave me alone." Mulan waved her hands to describe her frustration. "I don't even want their praise! I just want them to leave me in peace!"

Shang laughed. "He will win who knows when to fight."

His partner gave him a dry look. "Buddha?"

"Sun Tzu."

Mulan squinted at the sky. The sun's position was just right. "Speaking of the sun…" Mulan grabbed his arm. "Come with me. I'll show you something amazing."

She led him past her family gate. Though the area was not remotely mountainous there were still a few large hills. Mulan dragged Shang up a rough path lined with blooming trees. "This is beautiful."

Mulan grinned. "This isn't even the best part."

They finally came to the top of the hill. The sun was just beginning to set and the rays of light casting over the low clouds made for a pretty picture. It looked like the town was bathed in a warm golden light. The summer humidity seemed to vanish.

Shang was awed. Even the golden columns of the Emperor's palace did not shine this brightly.

"Amazing, isn't it?" Mulan talked softly. "Baba brought me here when I was small. I come here when I have time." She inhaled the fresh breeze. "When I'm up here during the winter I don't even feel the chill of the wind. Instead I imagine I'm flying."

"You would like to fly?"

"Wouldn't you?"

"I like my feet firmly on the ground."

Mulan snorted in an unladylike way. "Control freak."

Shang grinned. "Disgrace to all women."

Mulan gave a laugh that sounded more like a dog bark. "Those fools wouldn't last a day in basic training. The only reason why they weren't sent to army training was because their father's paid a hefty sum to keep their names off the recruitment list."

Shang shook his head. "No honor at all."

"And yet they have the gall to berate me for trying to bring my family honor."

"You don't pay them any attention, do you?"

"Of course not." With a snap of her wrist Mulan waved that suggestion away. "Those boys are fools. Weak, cowardly, and honorless. I'm the one who saved China. I'm the one who received the honor of the Emperor. I'm worth five of them or more. I-"

"Mulan." She turned to her general, who looked frighteningly serious. "It sounds like you're trying to convince yourself more than me."

The woman warrior blushed. "Sorry. Defending myself just becomes a habit, you know? I promise I'm really not ashamed."

In a move neither of them expected, Shang gently grasped her hand. The air seemed to still between them, with Mulan's heartbeat echoing through her chest. "I'll never be able to understand how your heart guides your actions. Every move I make is based on thought and strategy."

"Like Earth."

Shang blinked. "Excuse me?"

Mulan smiled. "Strong and steady. Predictable, but reliable. Always there when you need it most." She giggled. "Baba and I were discussing it the other day. How you and I are such opposites, yet so in harmony with each other. Our elements could only be opposites."

Shang smirked. "And you? What is your element?"

"Wind. Forever free and flowing. Never tamable. Soothing and playful, yet cutting."

The warm look Shang sent Mulan spread through her breast. "I think it describes you perfectly."

* * *

FINALLY FUCKING FINISHED!

Ugh, this one in particular took foreveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeer.

Can you see me on the ground? Because I am thanking everything in this world that I have finally gotten this out of my head.

PS: Ending sucks. I know. Deal.


End file.
